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Thread: Who Writes This Rubbish?

  1. #1
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    Default Who Writes This Rubbish?

    Hello All,

    I found this in the blurb associated with the opening of the newly re-vamped RAFM (which took place, incidentally, 3 months after the 100th anniversary of the foundation of the RAF, for which they had had only 100 years notice – unless my maths are worse than I thought!).

    Howard is an independent advisor providing strategic influence support primarily related to military and defence, air power and maritime capability, defence industrial and providing support for UK defence exports.

    I put it into Google translate, but it came up with the same translation! As a sentence it doesn’t make sense? Or have missed O-Levels, A-Levels, and a Degree in PR Gobbledegook? I read the same sort of tosh in the business section of my broadsheet newspaper with regard to failing companies and/or the overblown bonuses of the CEOs of self-same companies. Who writes this rubbish? – let alone believes it?

    I post this more in frustration than in any hope of receiving what it really means!! I despair!!

    Can the Mods please put a 72-hr 'Auto-Destruct' attachment to this?

    Peter Davies
    Meteorology is a science; good meteorology is an art!
    We might not know - but we might know who does!

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    Peter

    I think you've answered your own question: PR Gobbledegook. If you managed to watch any of the W1A series on the B.B.C. you'll know what I mean...

    Regards

    Simon

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    Dear Peter
    The answer is quite simple if you cut the sentence down a bit
    "Howard is an independent advisor providing strategic influence support primarily related to military and defence, air power and maritime capability, defence industrial and providing support for UK defence exports".
    should read:
    Howard is an Advisor, Related to Support for Defence.
    (Apologies to Howard, but don't you love acronyms).
    Best wishes
    James

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    Sorry
    Last word should be Exports not Defence.

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    Peter,

    You have to admit, though, that in recent years the PR-produced rubbish has become rubbish of the highest quality!

    Errol

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    Very frustrating with this 'qualification/experience creep'. Saw a newspaper bit two days ago about girl of 20 or so who was a: 'Government advisor', according to her. This might go someway to explaining a lot of things, if true!!!

    Colin Cummings

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    Is there not a case, therefore, for an International Bullsh1t Index, or some form of Crapometer, such that when one reads "a report has said", or "experts say", or "a Govt adviser has stated", that we should (a) know from which cash-strapped Uni this so-called alarmist 'report' originated, or (b) be able to automatically, on the internet, attached 'Credence Labels' to the various utterances?
    Utterences in the media are rarely political, they are mostly - in the end - financially orientated! We might start a new 'cottage industry'?!!
    Or does this smack too much of "Censorship"? If so then, for me, bring it on.
    HTH - but it won't"!
    Peter Davies
    Meteorology is a science; good meteorology is an art!
    We might not know - but we might know who does!

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    One might aspire to elevated plateaus of opaqueness using the Buzz Phrase Generator. To begin, make three columns of words. The first two columns must be relatively “posh”, and the third must be a noun. For example - Column 1 may be as follows:

    Accelerated
    Discriminating
    Retroactive
    Artificial
    Sustainable

    Column 2 may be as follows:

    Digressive
    Decipherable
    Intensive
    Externalized
    Statistical

    Column 3 may be:

    Project
    Policies
    Discussion
    Objectives
    Dimensions

    Now, randomly select one word from each column and you may compose some real zingers of poppycock - for example:

    Discriminating Externalized Policies
    Sustainable Decipherable Dimensions
    Accelerated Digressive Projects.

    Depending on your vocabulary, the possible dismissive expressions are limitless.

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    This subject often brings on an attack of my G.O.M. Syndrome (Grumpy Old Man).
    A long time ago I wrote a report for a client who sent it back asking me to make it more specific: when asked for an example of how the report could be made more specific the client replied that I had said an investigation ‘began’ instead of stating the stages that were required to approve the investigation. With tongue in cheek I suggested ‘The members of the committee began preparatory stages of establishing the initial parameters for beginning the first procedures in approaching an understanding of the as yet unproven reports concerning the events referred to in communications XXX (cited documents).’
    It was approved. I resigned from the project. They didn’t understand.

    Bruce
    http://www.filephotoservice.co.uk/
    RESEARCH AT THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES & OTHER UK INSTITUTIONS

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    One hopes, Bruce, you got paid for the work you had completed. Don't answer!

    Brian

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